First, I have to apologize for the lack of activity on here; things have been crazy to say the least. We have officially moved to what I am calling Hyssop Farms! However, right now it’s just a place of dreams, hopes, and some fears. But isn’t that the way of moves? Regardless of the type of move, a job, a home, or even a move in a game. They all come with hopes and dreams of better things; a winning move!
Too often, though, I can become overwhelmed with the fears. Those fears are mostly based on a lack of trust and a lack of control. With all of the stress of things, I found I needed to return to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. It’s been 26 years since my last meeting. One of the things I have realized for myseylf, is that when I feel like I can’t control the things around me, I can create very “feel-good” reality through escaping into a chemical induced hell. I call it hell because at the time it feels so good, but it breeds nothing but pain and suffering. Pain and suffering is not a winning move; we can all agree on that I am sure.
Thursday, February 23, we realized that our new water company was not going to have our new water tap installed before we moved in. I lost my mind! We had to make this move on Saturday the 25th, and we were going to be without water for an unknown amount of time. Talk about a lack of control! Even though, as I sat on a five gallon bucket in a cold and windy barn, I was reminded that God was in control and at least I had a bucket and four walls to poop in. Many don’t even have that. Many in this world don’t even have access to clean water. All I have to do is go to the store and buy it. I guess what I am saying is that we really can’t control anything other than our choices and responses to the all the elements around us.
The first step in AA is, We admitted we were powerless over alcohol that our lives had become unmanageable. I truly believe that if we were honest with ourselves, we could all replace the word alcohol with something. That step causes us to make a move… step 2: We come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity; step 3: We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand Him. That is the greatest move we can make in our lives.
Do you need to make a move?